It's Not About the Money
Ep. 240
| with
Scarlett Cochran

Follow Along:

My friend, Scarlett Cochran, is back on the podcast today to talk about how to think about your money in a way that lets you create the rich life you want today. 

If you didn’t catch Scarlett’s first episode on the podcast where she talked about her incredibly inspiring story (she went from single teen mom in the military making $25k a year to putting herself through Yale Law School to becoming a Banking and Consumer Finance Attorney to growing her platform One Big Happy Life to multiple six figures as a side hustle) make sure to check it out here.

But after coaching thousands of people on how to build wealth, Scarlett started seeing a pattern: People were living by other people’s money rules…even if it made their lives miserable. 

So she set out to change that. 

She wrote her first book, It’s Not About the Money, to change how people approach their money. The book gives a simple system for understanding and managing your money in a way that feels good to YOU so you can create the life you want to live TODAY and every day after that. 

And she’s on the podcast to talk about it with us today. 

Make sure to snag her book and follow her here: 

Show Transcript
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hey, welcome to Lessons from a Quitter where we believe that it is never too late to start over. No matter how much time or energy you've spent getting to where you are. If ultimately you are unfulfilled, then it is time to get out. Join me each week for both inspiration and actionable tips so that we can get you on the road to your dreams.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
Hello Scarlet, welcome to the show. Hey,
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Golly, so excited to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
I'm so excited that you're here. Thank you for taking the time to chat with us. We have so many exciting things to talk about, but one of the first things I wanna talk about. So if you have been around here a while and you will know that Scarlet was on the podcast before and I will link to it in the show notes. If you haven't listened to that episode, I highly recommend because we're not gonna spend as much time talking today about Scarlet's journey, but her journey is truly one of the most inspiring stories that I've ever heard. And I think for all of us quitters that wanna like start something new and really build big dreams, you have to hear about her story. But the last time she was on the show, you had a different name, you were Tasha Cochran, and now you're Scarlet. So tell us about that. What made you change your name?
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Well, honestly I never really liked my first name really my whole life, but I never liked any other name better. So I'm like, okay, well I don't really like this name, but I'll just keep it because nothing else is like doing it for me. Right. Yeah. And then in, oh my gosh, I guess it was June of 2021, right? Is that like, I swear the pandemic years just like blurred together 20 20, 20 21, 20 22. But yeah, June of 2021, right when things were starting to loosen up right where we could travel again, my son and I went on a Motherson trip and it was a magical two days. We had so much fun at this resort and on the very last night we were having this fancy like multicourse dinner and this is my like four year old, five year old son, okay . So like my very young child and we were having just the best time and the name Scarlet just drifted over to me like on the air currents from the table that right across from us.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
And I'm like, oh my gosh, that's the name. Even though I've heard the name Scarlet before, obviously because I know Scarlet Johansen, I don't even know her. Mm-hmm . But I love her. For some reason it just hit different. It was that moment sitting at the table with my son after a wonderful two days, our first trip right after the pandemic lockdowns and I'm like, that's the name. So I immediately texted my husband Joseph, my daughter Alexis on our family chat, my daughter Alexis is 19, and said, Hey, I think this is the name. And they're like, oh my gosh, of course it's the name . And from then on I was Scarlet. So then the next person I texted was uh, my lawyer and my publisher Penguin Random House to make sure that it was okay for me to change my name after they gave me this book deal. And they said, yeah, it's fine. And so filed the legal paperwork myself because you know, former lawyer and I've been scarlet ever since.
Speaker 2 (03:12):
I love this for so many reasons, but mostly because part of what I try to do on this podcast and a lot of what I coach on is like really just questioning these quote unquote rules that we live by that are completely made up these conventions that we all just go by. And honestly, I think you don't even question, it's not even something like, it's just like, well you're given a name and that's the name you have. And you know, obviously we have like you take your husband's name and that's starting to change, but really why can't you change your first name? And there's no reason that you can't. But I think so many of us, it's fascinating I think for people maybe to listen to, to even check in with like what was their first instinct or first thought when, you know I said that you would change your name. It's like why do we have that? And so I love just the example that it sets that like anything you don't like in your life, you're allowed to change.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
Yeah. And especially when we think about the sunk cost fallacy, this idea that we're so heavily invested in a thing that we can't change it. So at that time when I decided to change my name, I had just signed a book deal with a major publisher. I had so many media interviews, including when I guessed on this podcast, just what, a year or two before hundreds of YouTube videos, millions of views. So millions of people know me by this other name. Not to mention my legal career, my law school classmates knew me by a completely different name. My bar licenses were all under a different name. And so that was a whole lot to change. And frankly, it's still ongoing because like it messed up my credit when I was applying for a mortgage. They're like, who the hell is Scarlet Cochran? She doesn't have a credit profile. So that took a while to change. So it was an effort, but it was worth it, right? Just because I had all of this sunk into this old name didn't mean that I would continue forward with that name if I felt like it was no longer serving me.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Yeah, absolutely. And I mean, and again like it's just such a good example. Like our brain wants to go to, well it's just not possible. I have all of this history, I have all of this, you know, these media things. I have a whole, especially for you, you know, for so many of us, like we don't have a whole platform built on it. It's like you have an entire platform where you had hundreds of thousands of followers and you know, all of you built up so much. I just love the simplicity of it to be like, no, but I can just change it. Like, but of course it can happen, right? Like it's like truly just understanding that it's just a choice. All of this stuff is just one decision. And yeah, you have the effort, you have to change it. But so many of us don't even let ourselves get to that cuz it's like, oh it's not even possible. And it's like, oh, so much is possible if we just kind of allow it. I love that.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
The last thing I wanna say about that is that it, it was scary. Yeah, this is the other, I think people think that, oh she's just brave. I'm not, it was really scary, really awkward to this day. Even though I've changed my name now, it's been two years, sometimes I still look back on it and it's like, oh my gosh, who did? I think I was just, I've been changing my name, the audacity of this woman. So I just want you to know that you can have fearful thoughts, you can feel really uncertain, you can worry about judgment and still do the thing that you want to do.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Absolutely. I mean here, here to women with audacity, I love just, it is, it is like because it is audacious and I think in this society a lot of people do look at like who does she think she thinks she is? And we only break that by doing these things. I mean like this is who I am, I'm deciding to do this. And I love that you said that though, like the fear, it's not like you're just all common and zen. I wonder like I'm assuming that some people did have bad reactions to you changing your name and how you dealt with that.
Speaker 3 (06:50):
Yeah, I would say one of my biggest concerns has to do with my race because I'm black and scarlet is not a traditionally, you know, quote unquote black sounding name. And so I worried that people would think that I was trying to change my name to move away from my blackness and that was not the case at all. And I also was frustrated by this idea that because I'm black, I can't just pick a name, pick a name that I want, pick a name that I like without it meaning something else about me. And so I did a video on YouTube about why I changed my name and I spoke about, well this is something that I was concerned that people would say. And people did say that, right? Because everyone has an opinion about how you should live your life. But luckily I thought that that would come up and I just addressed it for myself, which is that you know what? They're entitle, they can have their opinions. I don't know about if people are entitled to , if they can have them and I don't have to care that they have them because at the end of the day, I'm the one that has to live with the choices that I make, not them.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
Ugh, I love it so much. Brooke Castillo has recently said a quote and it's like, if someone's gonna be mad about your life, it shouldn't be you. And it's like just such a like true statement of really like yeah you're not gonna stop other people's thoughts. And it's one of the most liberating things is giving people permission to just have them like really not concerning yourself with trying to make like control people's because it's impossible but truly like getting to a place of acceptance of yeah, you're gonna think whatever you want and I know my own truth and you may not believe it, I don't need you to believe it. I don't have to prove myself, I don't have to overexplain, I get to just sit in this and I still get to do what I wanna
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Do. And that also applies to your parents by the way, which a lot of people ask me like, oh my goodness, what would your parents think? Or would say more judgmentally, I would never do that because I have too much respect for my parents. And my initial thought was, well if my parents love me, if my parents care about me having my best life, then they won't be invested in the name that they give me or the name that they call me and they'll be happy that I'm happy. And I say this as someone whose children have changed their names. Oh, before they were 18, well they still go by their, the legal names that I gave them. But for a whole year my daughter Alexis went by the name Evangeline because there was another Alexis in her class. And when the teacher asked her like, oh do you wanna abbreviate to Lexi? She's like, no, Evangeline . And so then she just became Evangeline for a year. So I think that this idea that we have to continue to live our lives in accordance with our parents' preferences, I'm like, I'm 40 years old , at some point my parents have to let go. And luckily that wasn't a problem, right? I just, but I also didn't make it a problem. I said, look, I changed my name and that's it. There was no opportunity for discussion about it.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
Totally. Uh, so many things, I mean we could honestly, I can talk about this for the next hour but I know we're not here to talk about your name change. You're here to talk about your book. And so I wanna get to that. Congratulations on, I mean such a huge accomplishment. Can you walk us through a little bit like what made you wanna write a book? Like how did this book deal kind of come about? Because I think again, if people listen to the last podcast we talked about how you built up your platform and you have this brand one big happy life and you teach people really in your membership you can talk more about what like what your membership is about, but you allow people to create kind of wealthy lives the way they def define it. So what made you decide to take on kind of this huge project of publishing a book in the traditional way too? Not like publishing it on Amazon but getting a publisher and, and now you're doing all the media appearances and all that, it's like a full-time other job. So walk us through that a little
Speaker 3 (10:35):
Bit. Oh my gosh, it really is a full-time job and maybe we can talk a little bit about how the dream of writing a book versus the reality is so different. Mm oh yes. But I have always dreamed of writing a book. I from a very young age was a writer, but I wrote poetry and speculative fiction. So vampire novels and werewolf novels really in like middle school where my friends would be gathering around to see the next chapter that I hand wrote on like college lined paper of my book. And so I always thought that I would write a book but that it would be some series about you know, vampires or werewolves. And so I've written on and off my whole life. But then I started one big Happy life and I started teaching personal finance after spending 10 years as a banking and finance attorney regulating the banking industry on a federal level.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
So one of the things that I did notice is that there's a lot of noise out there. There are a lot of people, we live in a world where you can just kind of go out there and just start publishing things, whether or not they're true. And I'm not just talking like little people who are new to the scene but really some of the biggest people out there, some of the things that they spread are just not true. It is actual misinformation. You know, for example, some of the things that I saw Dave Ramsey say saying about public service loan forgiveness, he was saying things that just were not actually factually accurate. And so that really concerned me and so I really saw writing a book as a way of for better or worse, like legitimizing the brand as something that was more than just someone who is out here saying things.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
Nevermind the fact that I was a lawyer and I had 10 years of experience regulating the industry, but in my mind I had this thought that the book would legitimize everything that I was saying. Which I will preface by saying that that's not a good reason to write a book. It's better to deal with your own thoughts about what other people say about the what you teach and just stay grounded in the fact that you know what you're talking about and what you're saying is legitimate and that's enough. But look, , I did always want to write too, but I just wanna be transparent about that.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
I love that. Thank you for for being honest about that because I think that's a lot of people what a lot of us do these kind of things, it's sort of we want are on this hamster wheel to like con continuously try to prove that we are good enough to say this thing or we are good enough and it's okay. Like we all kind of need that sometimes like some of that evidence but really even getting to the point of becoming aware of like, oh I just need to get grounded in my own belief that like I'm good enough to say this and I don't need to do, you know, this is probably not the reason to write a book. I mean we're glad you did write a book but thank you for being honest about that
Speaker 3 (13:17):
. But now that I have written it, my reasoning is better right now that I've come to terms with that, which is that it's a body of work. It really does present people with a new approach to thinking about and managing their finances and setting financial goals. And it's something fresh that I think has been kind of lost in the weeds, which is that we, we don't exist to take care of money like it's a plant and our, our life is spent taking care of it. In reality it exists to take care of us. And so we need to get back in the driver's seat when it comes to our money, including how much of it we make. So it's really about empowering people to make financial decisions that align with the life that they want versus what we've all been hearing all these rules about no lattes and the 50, 30, 20 budget percent rules. We don't need any of that stuff, right? We just need to understand money and then be confident in our ability to make financial decisions to get the outcome we want. And that's the message of the book. And so for that reason I'm so glad that I wrote it so that people can find this information in one place and disseminate it to other people.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
Yeah. Well I'm so glad you wrote it too cuz we definitely mean people disseminating that. So it's called, it's not about the money. And so I think what you mean by, well tell me what you mean by that. You think you just touched on it but why did you name it that
Speaker 3 (14:40):
That so often again we were taught to make financial decisions from the perspective of the money. So we spend the least amount possible. It's not okay for us to spend money, it's we should want to be frugal but at the end of the day it's not about the money, it's about the life that we create based on our, the financial decisions that we make. And so it's just reminding people that your financial decisions shouldn't start with, well I wanna spend the least amount possible, but it should start with your desire. What do you want to have in your life? What does a fulfilling and rich life look like for you? And then you start asking the question and then how do I use my money to accomplish that?
Speaker 2 (15:24):
Oh interesting. I love that. But what about like people, I mean I just know people are gonna be like, yeah but I can only have the life that I want based on the amount of money that I make. I can sit down and dream all day about what I want for my life, but if I only make you know $50,000 a year, like my lifestyle is going to be capped at what I make.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
And that is true. Your lifestyle is capped at what you make, but what you make is not capped. So in the book there's a whole section on what I call the seven money capacities, which are the essential skills that you need to master in order to be completely effective with money, right? To be able to use your money to create the life that you want. And one of them is to learn how to make money. That is a skill and we're not really taught that. We're taught like you get a job and you get paid whatever the employer wants to pay you. And especially if you come from you know, a blue collar background like I did, my dad was a mechanic, um, neither one of my parents graduated from high school. There's this deep gratitude for any job versus just trying to figure out what job do I actually want?
Speaker 3 (16:35):
What are the skills that are required for that next level and then how can I set myself up to be the best candidate to get that position? And those are two very different approaches that will create very different results. So for me, I started out single team mom making $25,000 a year as an active duty marine and I knew that I wanted more. I knew that the lifestyle I wanted costs more but I didn't know how to get another job. The Marine Corps was the only job I had known and everyone in the Marine Corps was telling me, look, this is the best job you're ever gonna have so you should just be grateful for this job, do your 20 years and then you will have this retirement that you can rely on for the rest of your life. And for me, I knew I wanted more, I just didn't know how to do it.
Speaker 3 (17:23):
But lucky for me and lucky for everyone that's alive right now, we have access to the internet where we can start googling some of these things to help us get moving in the right direction. So I googled and also I only knew of basically two careers, right? This is how limited my worldview was. I could be a doctor or a lawyer, right? And underneath doctor I understood nurse, so doctor, lawyer, nurse only acceptable careers. I started out with the nursing thing and then didn't wanna do the practicals dealing with bodily fluids and such. So then I decided to be a lawyer and I googled how to get into law school and that was it. And so the information is out there and you just have to believe that making the effort to go after the income that you want is going to create better results than just sitting and waiting for someone to give you the income you desire.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Oh my god, I love this so much. I just did, I mean I did a podcast episode a couple of maybe, um, a couple months ago now about like being open to possibilities and dreaming bigger. We did a class inside the quarter club about dreaming bigger and one of the things we talk about is like we're so scared to even admit what we want because we're so afraid of being disappointed or that it's not possible that most of us don't even know what we want. And I think this like touches on that you're so right that like most of us are even afraid to utter how much money we want to make because there's so much shame around money. We've been so conditioned to like feel guilty for wanting, which is crazy cuz it's like the one resource that affects every aspect of your life.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
And yet we've been conditioned through religion and you know, patriarchy and white supremacy and all of this stuff to like feel so much shame for wanting it. So we don't say it and yet obviously the desire is there because everything we want in our life needs money. And so we have this like I think so many of us, this restlessness that we feel is like we want something more but we don't know what we want. We don't ever say it. So then if we don't know, there's no way to go after it. And I love the simplicity of what you're saying is like really if you admit to yourself like what it is, like this is how much I wanna earn, then you can get to work reverse engineering or figuring out the puzzle how much you know, how do you, what jobs pay a hundred thousand dollars or whatever it is that you wanna do. So that it's so simple and so genius.
Speaker 3 (19:36):
Yeah and we're just never taught it. That's really just it And it's becau at least for me, my parents weren't taught to think that way either. So it's not a surprise that we struggle with that I think. But I think going forward you're gonna see more and more people talking about this. I see this outside of the personal finance space. When I first started talking about actually enjoying your life with money, no one was doing this. You know, back in 2017 it was all about Uber frugality, it was all about the fire movement and retiring early. And look, the fire movement is still going strong but even it has expanded beyond the uber frugal version of fire to now there's like fat fire, which by the way is just like retirement, like . I mean
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Well let me just pause for though cuz if people that are listening don't know what fire is, it's called finance, it's financial independence retire early and it's a movement of people where they basically want like it's minimalism, you're getting rid of everything and like really getting down to the like baseline of expenses that you could live on so you can kind of grow that and retire early and then kind of do whatever you wanna do. But it is in the beg height of the movement, it was like really un frugality
Speaker 3 (20:46):
And now it's gone to the point where you just decide the lifestyle that you want and often it's a more extravagant lifestyle, maybe even a luxurious lifestyle. And so then you base your fire number, your financial independence number off of uh, you know, a bigger budget. And so that's called fat fire. That also is just like retirement, right? Yeah. You just decided that you're not gonna retire at 65, which by the way, who said it's like these movements come up in relation to like cutting against quote unquote rules. But whoever said retirement was at 65, no one said that it had to be social security. You can't get social security benefits till 65, but no one told you you had to wait till 65 to retire. In fact, people in the military have been retiring at 40 forever . So it's not new, it's just packaged in this like fancy mainstream thing that makes people think this is the key to happiness. When in reality the key to happiness is figuring out what you actually want, what your ideal life looks like, and then you go after that life.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
Yeah, I mean you're such a, the thing is that you're such a perfect example for this. You're such an incredible spokesperson for this because you walked the walk. I think for so many people it's easy to be like, oh it's easy for you to say like let's say Dave Ramsey, okay you're a white male and you probably ha and who, I don't know his story, so whatever, but like as a black woman who started out, like you said a teen mom making $25,000 in the military to not only becoming a lawyer and making, well six figures, multiple six. And you talk, I think we talked about this on your last episode too, but like you, you were doing this before you did any of this. Like you were very strategic about your income as a lawyer. Like you constantly were looking for the job that was gonna, you moved states, you were like, where am I gonna get paid more?
Speaker 2 (22:26):
You were very strategic about creating that life and then you built this platform and you started making multiple, you know, even, I don't know if it was more than what you were making as a lawyer, but you were started making multiple six figures in this business. I mean honestly just by way of example, without saying any, like saying all of the stuff that you're saying, I think you're, it is such a perfect example of what's possible of like deciding what you want and going after it and really building it. So, but I know that there are people who are listening to this and they just really can't even get their brain to believe like it's like no, what I have the skills for can only make this much what I, you know, all they've ever seen maybe is that like my family makes X amount or people like me with this degree is make this how do you work? Maybe or what maybe what do you say to the people that you work with who feel stunted or limited and even believing that it's possible to make more than they're making
Speaker 3 (23:20):
One, we could say it may be true, it may be true that if you decide, let's say for example you want to be a teacher, an elementary school teacher in a public school that working for someone else, right? That your salary is not going to be six figures. That may be true. And so given reality then the question becomes, okay, so then what do you do next? And so maybe you don't do public school, maybe you move into private school. Maybe you are not a teacher but you move into administration, maybe you teach in a different way. If teaching is what you want to do and teaching young children, is there a way that you can teach young children and make more money? Maybe it's a boarding school, right? I hear some of those boarding schools cost like 40, $50,000 a year, so maybe they're paying their teachers better. It's all about practicing possibilities. So what are my options? What are my requirements? What is it that I'm actually aiming for? And then what are my options? And so you just start asking yourself the question and maybe the question becomes, and you may have to make choices, right? It's prioritizing too. Do you want to be the public elementary school teacher in this small town or do you want to make the six figures And sometimes you're gonna have to make a hard choice. Yeah,
Speaker 2 (24:41):
Absolutely. And it is a choice, right? It is. Like you can't, and I think part of it is that we, again, you have to sort of work on the shame of wanting money. I think for so many of us we wanna make a different choice but then we get stuck in quite a, this like martyr kind of good person syndrome of like, and and I say this as a former public defender or public interest journey. Like there was very much this identity piece of well I can't want to make more money or I can't leave these people. And so I think it's really grappling with your own identity of what's allowed for you to go after. And even if you decide to stay, I think you, you are an example of this, but so many teachers like also make money by teaching on the side or making resources on the side. And I think you are still working full-time as a lawyer while you had built up, you know, one big happy life to make over six figures,
Speaker 3 (25:25):
Right? Yeah. And can we also validate this idea that maybe you don't want to make six figures, right? I said you have to ask the question, do you prefer to have this be your life's work, the elementary school teacher in this small town that you love or do you want to make six figures? Right? And also the work life balance, right? Let's look at what you get when you're a teacher. You've got the summers off, you ha you're home for dinner most of the time with your family. And so maybe I think it is equally valid to say I love this life, I love this work that I'm doing. This is what what I feel called to do. And allow yourself to say, well I don't need to have a six figure income, I don't need to have a 10 million nest egg. I can do a 3 million le nest egg and maintain this lifestyle for the rest of my life. And so just recognizing that you get to decide what your vision of enough looks like.
Speaker 2 (26:25):
I love that so much. I know you talk a lot about like building that nest egg in your membership and wealth builders society, people can join and kind of build that. Um, is that similar to what you cover in the book or is the book more like you were saying really changing your mindset and capacity for having money and how you wanna go after your, your money?
Speaker 3 (26:43):
Yeah, so there is some overlap. Obviously we go a lot deeper inside of Wealth Builder Society and we're able to get really specific. So for example, in part two of the book I talk about rewriting money stories. So those old money scripts and thoughts that we have that aren't serving us, how do rewrite them? But I only cover seven or eight and there are so many more because every person is unique and has a unique upbringing and unique life experiences that creates those scripts in our minds. And so that's why it's important to have the kind of support and coaching that we have inside of Wealth Builders Society because then you can get those thoughts that are specific to you addressed and also doing the deeper work. So in the book I can talk about and I do talk about how you can define what a rich life looks like for you, but oftentimes it takes lots of digging and coaching and also being exposed to other people doing the work because so many of us aren't surrounded by people who are trying to grow and create their version of an extraordinary life.
Speaker 3 (27:49):
So many of us for a long time have been living life on default and this will be the first time that you've been invited to expand in your life. And so to be in a community of people who are doing things that may they never thought was possible for them can really expand what you think is possible for you as well. But in the book there is enough there to get you started, right? Because I talk about changing your money stories, I walk you through how to start defining what a rich life looks like for you, including my favorite exercise, which is the 100 year old self exercise where you're looking back on your life. And then I also teach you how to start your money practice. So the practical things that you need to do to manage your money on a day-to-day basis.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
I love all that. And so what is like the main thought or idea that you would love people to like take away from this book? Like when they read this book that they can truly, like if you wish you could wave a magic wand and everyone could understand this and it would change them, what is that main takeaway?
Speaker 3 (28:53):
I hate the one main takeaway thing. I think I'm gonna do a run on sentence. I'm gonna do a run on sentence, which is that I want them to understand that they are in control, that they get to make choices that will create the life that they want, right? And you're gonna be making those choices anyway. So why not make the ones that get you closer to the most extraordinary expansive version of your life and that you can enjoy your life, your whole life. You do not need to delay gratification or defer enjoying your life until sometime in the future when your finances look different or better or until you're a millionaire, you can start enjoying your life right now. So that's my run on sentence for my Love it. One thing that you're gonna take away from,
Speaker 2 (29:39):
I love it, but, and before I was gonna gonna and like kind of wrap it up, but I do have this other question when we talk about building wealth and we talk about kind of wealth planning and I know you talk a lot about like building that nest egg. There is a lot of talk about like starting investing early. Obviously the earlier you start the better it is. So I think a lot of people then have both the shame and just kind of a resigned, well I've waited too long, it's too late. I think like maybe people that have, you know, are in their forties or fifties or whatnot and it's like they haven't done the savings. What do you, would you say to them? Like if somebody is sort of at this kind of defeated, well it's kind of too late, I'm not gonna create an est egg that big, where do they start?
Speaker 3 (30:17):
Well they start by getting started investing because the sooner you start the better. It doesn't matter that you've waited to start that's in the past. What matters is what you do from this point going forward and the choices that you make right now can make a huge difference over the course of the next 10 years, 20 years. And you just have to remind yourself that you can only be in a better position by making better choices now you're not gonna be any worse off. So then you're really asking yourself, do I wanna be in a p a better position or a worse position? And if the answer is better, which for everyone it's going to be, then you know that it's not about too late or not. It's just am I going to do something differently or not? And do I wanna live with the consequences of if I don't do something different and the answer's gonna be no,
Speaker 2 (31:10):
Of course. Yeah. It's so simple and yet so many of us get caught into this and we just like continue because of these shame spirals just like sabotaging ourselves instead of being like, okay, I didn't know, cause I've never taught this stuff. Nobody has ever told us this. And a lot of us didn't have this financial education from our families growing up. And so it's like, but now I know. So our lives are so long, you know, like yes, life is short, but they're also, it's also very long and a lot of us, when we think, I wish I started at 25. Okay great, but I still have 20, 30, 40 years, right? So what, what am I gonna do to set myself up so that in 40 years I'm like, Hey, thank you 40 year old self for actually getting started.
Speaker 3 (31:47):
Speaker 2 (31:48):
Yeah. I love that. Okay, so when does this book come out and where can we get it? Tell us all the things.
Speaker 3 (31:53):
Okay, so I am calling it My Love Gift to the World because it's coming out on Valentine's Day. Oh I love it. And there's a whole slew of bonuses just that I created to go along with the book, make it easier for you to implement. And so you can find out about how to pre-order the book everywhere where books are sold. So Target, Amazon, your local book seller, Barnes and Noble, audible I, um, narrated Oh right, narrated the book. So you will hear my voice speaking the book to you at one big happy
Speaker 2 (32:26):
Oh that's easy enough. And we'll put that in, um, the show notes. But I mean, what a perfect Valenti gift to yourself starting to learn about your money. Everybody should go and buy. It's not about the money. And then you can definitely find Scarlet on the interwebs everywhere at one big happy life and start following her so you can start changing that money mindset and living a wealthier life, uh, whatever that means for you. Thank you so much for joining us, Scarlet. Is there anything else that you wanna leave us with or have we covered it all?
Speaker 3 (32:58):
Um, I will leave you with two things. One, that how you manage your money is how you live your life. Two, life is the thing that happens between your goals. So make sure that you're taking a balanced approach so that you can enjoy the journey.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
I always love having you on the show. Thank you so much. I can't wait to see this book come out into the world and that all the lives it's gonna change. Thank you so much for doing this work and hopefully we'll have you on soon to talk about more money things cause we can talk about money forever.
Speaker 3 (33:29):
Yes, 100%. I'd love to come back. Thanks for having me, Goli.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
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