People tell you well, you're just self-sabotaging yourself. Okay um but how? Please point it out and they'd be like well… and wouldn't really have an answer. Or, you know, I had someone else who was constantly telling me you have a fixed mindset. Be like well uh okay, nobody could tell you how to stop having one.

Hey, welcome to Lessons From a Quitter where we believe that it is never too late to start over. No matter how much time or energy you spent getting to where you are, if ultimately you are unfulfilled, then it is time to get out. Join me each week for both inspiration and actionable tips so that we can get you on the road to your dreams.

Hello, my friends. Welcome to another episode of Lessons From A Quitter. I am so excited you are here. You're in for a treat. My husband has been complaining to me that I don't do interviews anymore. He was like why don't you have anyone on the podcast anymore? And he's right and I would love to have some more people that I think can help inspire and elevate the conversation and really show people what's possible. And so I'm so excited today to have my friend, Lisa McFadden, on who was a part of my program last year. And we will talk all about what she got out of the program, how the program helped her and what it led her to go on and do. And it, uhh, it just warms my little heart. So we'll jump into that in a minute but I want you to keep in mind that if Lisa's story kind of speaks to you, if you hear a lot of what she went through in what you're going through, then I want you to stop suffering alone. I want you to stop trying to figure it all out alone. It just goes so much faster if we do it together and you let me help you. I am getting ready to open up doors to the next round of Pave Your Path. Doors will open to everybody on March 9th but they open to the wait list on March 7th. And as I've mentioned, like I like to keep these groups rather small so I can help each of you as much as possible. And so there's limited spots. So if you're ready to go, right, if you're like I'm done doing the same groundhogs day day after day, month after month, year after year. I'm done hating what I do and being miserable and feeling stuck and not knowing what else is there. I want to feel better. I want to like my life. I want to clean up all of the mind drama around my career now so that I can start figuring out what it is I want. And I wanna stop lying to myself that I don't know what it is I want. And I think actually Lisa's story is gonna be really key on that point. We'll talk about that in a minute, but if you're ready for all that, then I want you to sign up for the wait list, okay. You can go to lessonsfromaquitter.com/paveyourpath and get on the wait list so that when doors open next week, you will be first in line and you can snag a spot and we can do this work deeply together for six months. We just unlearn basically everything you've ever learned, no pressure. We're just gonna unlearn all the BS that society has told us about the fact that we have to keep achieving in order to someday get to some place where we might be happy. And we're gonna start being happy now and figuring out what we want from that place. So that's my very longwinded way of saying doors are opening. Let's go people. It's gonna be six months starting in April. We're gonna do it together. It's gonna be a lot of fun. So get on that wait list, lessonsfromaquitter.com/paveyourpath. Okay, now onto Lisa. I adore Lisa and you'll see, she's hilarious. But her story is just what I see in so many people. And so to see how much change she's made in less than a year is amazing. Lisa is an award-winning filmmaker, screenwriter and playwright. She had received her MBA, uh, from University of Texas and had spent 13 years climbing the corporate ladder. And when she came into the program, she was where a lot of you guys are, where I see this a lot where it's just absolutely miserable, unhappy where she is, and really at a place of feeling hopeless, where you don't know what else there is to do. She had moved to LA to pursue screenwriting and writing and she just never had time for it because every day was not only spent with the actual like physical energy of being at work but with the mental energy. And so I know so many of you feel this where it's like I'm so exhausted by the end of the day that I don't have time to do anything else or think of anything else or work on my passion projects. And what was amazing to me is that she came in, most people that come to me don't really know what they wanna do or have a couple things in mind but there's people like Lisa who clearly have a talent, clearly have a passion, clearly know what they wanna do and have just followed what everybody else told them is or isn't possible, right? Like you can't make a career as a writer, you have to be on this corporate ladder. Don't give up the security, even if it makes you miserable, even if you don't get to do the thing that you love. And I remember when she came in, I was like wait, I don't get it. Why don't we just do writing? And there was some resistance to that. And so I'm so proud of her and I'm happy to see that she has now left her company and started her own business called The Writer's Mindset. And she helps people who are creatively blocked for several years and who have the mindset blocks that so many artists do. And it's from her own experience of going through the same things of encountering what most writers tend to encounter. And she now helps writers from all arenas quiet that inner critic, uncover their own writing process and start creating again. And so what we will talk about is how she's kind of made this shift right, from feeling stuck, feeling like it was not possible to ever help anybody else, a lot of the imposter syndrome. Her story is so amazing because I watch this, especially with women who have accomplished all these things, right. And we'll talk about the fact that she had written screenplays and made films that had gone on to film festivals and won awards. And she still wanted to believe like I don't have anything to offer. I can't help anybody else. And when we got past a lot of those lies, she realized how much she actually did have to help. And now she has this business and she's living a life where she's happy and she likes what she does. And she has time and energy to do her passion projects and she gets to help other people. And it's all just so amazing. So I will stop rambling so you can hear from the amazing Lisa.

Hi Lisa, thank you so much for joining me. I'm so excited for this!

Hi. Yeah, me too. Thank you so much for having me.

Of course, this is so fun. Okay. So you have been a listener of the podcast so I know you know how this works. Before you joined the group coaching program, why don't you tell us a little bit about what you were doing? Like what your job was and more importantly, like how you were sort of feeling in that role?

I was living in Los Angeles and I had moved there to be a screenwriter. And in the process of that, I had a day job, which I had been working at for 13 years. And I was a project manager at a bank. And I had been a project manager in the financial industry for like I said, for 13 years, after graduate school.

And graduate school was, you got your MBA, right?

Yes. It was really, it was really stressful. It was a very stressful job. You know, as I advanced in the career, the scope of the projects became larger and larger but it it never seemed to get better or easier. As I worked to increase my income to support myself to live in Los Angeles, uh it was kind of a backward bending curve in that I had less time to spend writing. So…

Yeah, tell us a little about that. Like where the dream to become a screenwriter came from or why you came to LA? Kind of what your maybe your background is with writing.

I started writing actually as a as a child. In first grade, I had a teacher who had us write a bunch of stories and then she published them in hardback books. And we each got our own hardback book with your name embossed and everything. And that was kind of it like I was kind of hooked.

I love that, yeah.

So I continued to write all my life but uh I kind of put it out there in the form of journalism but I was always told in my family uh that writing you can't make a living as a writer and you'll be very poor and unhappy. And basically just make it sound like no one's gonna love you. Uh, you're just gonna live in a tiny apartment in New York with like surrounded by newspapers or something. I don’t know. But just like the picture of it was very dim and kind of like you should, you know, business is very respected and my parents had businesses and you know, it was just like this is the route that you go. So I felt as I got older largely misunderstood and writing helps me let you know how I feel if I was not able to articulate it um verbally, I could really put you in the position to feel what I feel, not so much hear what I feel but feel it like I want you to feel it.

I love that. You had success with your writing, even though you were doing it kind of on the side, right?

Yeah, I've had some success with it in uh, you know, in some film festivals. And then I wrote a play and it was produced and they changed a line in it and it changed the whole meaning of the play. And I found that discomforting. Yeah, so that's where I came in and thought okay, I'm just gonna, I'm gonna make my own film. So then I did and I tell you, I was really in my head about it. Um I wrote this script and I was, it was a short film. I was terrified to share it with anybody, even my closest friends who were in this game too. We were all gonna make films together. And I was terrified to share with anybody. It was such a personal venting through this character. I I just thought it was stupid. Everybody's gonna look at it, they're gonna say oh, this is stupid. This is dumb. You know, why? Who she she doesn't know what she's doing. And when I showed it to people, they just thought it was hilarious and we shot it and it went to a bunch of film festivals and I won awards for [That's amazing.] the writing. And it was very unexpected. [Yeah.] It was very unexpected but it was very fun.

Yeah, I mean, I think that's part of, you know, obviously like a lot of what we do here is uh mindset work but it's, you know, even within this, especially I think with people who are sharing some thing that they're really passionate about and it's like a creative outlet. I think there tends to be a lot of the kind of imposter syndrome thoughts. The reality is like we're just terrible judges of our own stuff. Like we're our worst critics, we’re extremely hard on ourselves and it's interesting to see how much gets covered or doesn't get put out there only because of our own secure insecurity not because it's actually not good or, you know, like we're just so scared to be judged or to even put it out there. Like the idea of failing is so horrible for so many of us that we constantly like keep a lot of our talents and a lot of these gems that we have within us hidden. And so it's such a great story. I mean, I think that it happens to everybody and to see somebody that does push through, you know, it takes a lot of courage to kind of put that out there and then see the reception. And when you say it's like not expected, it's interesting. Like why wasn't it expected, right? Like why is it that we don't get to see our own genius? And so um I'm glad that you put it out there. I'm glad that you kept doing it. So I love that. Okay. And so tell us why you joined the program like what was happening for you when you decided to join at the time? It was called Stuck To Strategy but our six month group.

Well, yeah, it was Stuck To Strategy and the word stuck was like oh, that's, I think that's it. Um I had of course been listening to a podcast and yours was recommended on the same subject matter in Spotify. And so I went, I scrolled down. I was like oh okay, this is great. And I started listening to your podcast and it everything you were saying was resonating. And I was like wow, this, she sounds like like we would be friends. This is like this is amazing. Like everything you're saying is ringing something with me. So I binged it. And then I got in on the you had a goal setting in January. And so I got in on that. And then you started talking about the larger program, the Stuck To Strategy. And the thing that rang with that was because at the time I was so tired, I felt like I was just in this loop of like I would reach out and try something and then fall back. And no matter what I did, I was always in this bank job, not getting any further with finishing, you know, screenplays and manuscripts and or even an essay at that point. And like you, you know, at some point you're just like I know that I have so much more to offer and to give and I can't seem to find an outlet for it. And I just started to feel kind of hopeless, you know? And so I came into the program thinking well, I just need another day job. So maybe she can help me, you know, I'll I'll go and we'll find out what's stuck. And then I'll get into another day job. You know, instead of like no, like you're gonna focus on what it is you really want to do. That was my goal with it. And of course, it blew me outta water. Like the whole program like changed my whole life is completely different now. Cause it's been almost a year. [Yeah.] Like and I remember just being there like oh, I can't wait, what in a year? Like you know, the impossible goal like in a year. Oh my gosh. I don't know. And man, I mean like it really changed.

Yeah. And then we're gonna get into that. It's so funny to see. And obviously for people that join the program like everybody's in different places. And I would say the majority of people actually don't really know what they want to do like they don't have this passion. And so it's always interesting for me when people that do know what they love, like do know, you know, I love writing, I wanna do writing but we just have all of these thoughts that like but I can't do it. I I just gotta get another day job, you know? And it's so interesting for me to question like but why? I don't get it. Like if you already know, you know that's the hard part is figuring out what it is you wanna do. So like you already have that. So why are we not going after this? And obviously it's a lot of not only programming but just our fears and stuff. And it was for me, like it's the greatest gift to see the difference in people. And when you came into the program, I mean, you were so unhappy. It was like it was…

And it's like hyper, right? [Yeah.] Cause I'm so dramatic. So it's just like I'm extra unhappy like I'm the unhappiness person.

Yeah, I remember. I mean, there was a lot of drama around it like a lot of drama in the sense of like how horrible the job was and like how much I have to get out of this, which is fine. And it was like okay, if it's like you know, a toxic environment or we don't like it fine, like what are we gonna do here? But to see how much you changed over the six months and to see just like this light, you know, within you, I think it's just been the most amazing thing to watch. So I would love to know kind of what your experience was like going, you know, you can correct me if I'm wrong but there was almost, I don't wanna use the word, like a desperation, but it's like I gotta figure out something, something has to change. And like hopefully this is it. I'm gonna join this program. And hopefully this just changes something for me.

Yeah.

And so tell us what changed, like what was it in the program that you think helped you kind of make a shift?

Well, I became empowered and I didn't know how to get to the empowered part. And I was really frustrated because I think very strategically so I see plans and I just go like you know, I'm ready to go. Let's go. I already see it ahead of time. I don't wanna explain myself. Let's do it. So I would just kind of, it sounds so weird, but on the outside I would look at myself or my brain as like a machine and there's something broken and I can't figure out what it is. And it's one thing to have people tell you well, you're just self-sabotaging yourself. And I would just be like okay um but how? Like how am I? Please point it out. And they'd be like well, and wouldn't really have an answer. Or, you know, I had someone else who was constantly telling me about my writing: you have a fixed mindset, you have a fixed mindset. Be like well, okay. And they just like kind of give you a list of here's some things that make it a fixed mindset but nobody could tell you how to stop having one. And that like the minute you started getting into that, which is at the very beginning of the program, I that's when I just clicked. And I was like okay, I have to do this. And so I started running like dun dun dun oh, I fix it. And then, you know, but then you're gonna run into hurdles like all the time because, you know, I'm a person who like you know, I'm a writer, I write, so I'm alone. I lived alone. And then I've now I'm in this environment where I like you know, I'm in a house with family and and so there's relationships and there's stuff that always you always have to work on. And I think in the program, I, you know, I took off and I was like yes. And I was making all this progress. And then I just, you know, you like hit a wall. You're gonna like dig in. And and I just kind of like I don't know, for a while I was like oh my God, you know, just trying to figure stuff out and get over these hurdles. But then once I did and I realized that it's we make it difficult. We make everything hard. And then I think that's really what clicked. And I was like oh, well it doesn't have to be hard. It doesn't have to be oh, I'm doing it. And so when I saw that I was doing it and what I'm in control of, like I'm not in control of all these other people or the relationships. And I really think that it centered in that day job where I was on some calls one day and I, it was so strange, like it was a sudden realization through the whole program, I had built all this confidence and all these by-products that, you know, I didn't realize were gonna happen. And I learned to trust myself. That was the biggest, that was key. That was key. And when I did that and I was on these calls and I realized oh my God, like you don't deserve me. Like I shouldn't be here. And that's why I'm unhappy. And I was just like oh, it was just, it was huge. I was like this, I know that I could offer more. They do not want more from me. So I need to go and find out where I can offer more. That's really what it was. And I was like okay, well then that's what I'm gonna do. And it was really actually in the end, that simple, it was just like okay, no, I I need to figure out how I can no longer be here.

I love it so much. I mean, it's it, you know, we laugh about but I think it's it's really funny because when you think back and ev- a lot of people feel like this and I'm not in any way, uh there's no judgment because I felt exactly like this too, where it's like you truly feel like you're stuck and it's such a subtle mindset shift to really look what you just said was so powerful, realizing like what do I control? And when you can really get that and when you realize like oh, I'm not stuck at all, there's a million things I can do. And part of that is that disempowered mindset like thinking you're stuck just puts you into a victim mentality, right. If you're stuck and there's nothing you can do and you're hopeless, it's a terrible place to live in. Right. Cause then it's like like you said, it's like groundhogs’ day. It's just like I have to endure. I just have to get up every day and endure what everybody's gonna throw at me. [Yeah.] Nobody wants to live like that. Right. And it's amazing to see like nothing actually has to change except for the way that you start thinking about it. And when you start realizing like oh, I actually have a ton of control, I'm choosing not to. And that's fine. Sometimes it's because of fear. Sometimes it's because of money. Sometimes, whatever it might be. But even just that small, subtle shift can help you start realizing okay, if I have the control and I can choose, what do I want to choose on purpose instead of just like from this place of it's always been like this, I'm very scared, I don't know what else to do, so much more opens up. And it's so amazing to watch. And I think what you said earlier too, like as you've built that self-trust and that confidence, then it becomes easier when you know that control. And you're like oh, it was a lie that I couldn't trust myself. It was a lie that I couldn't rely on myself. Once I see those lies, it becomes easier to say like I'm gonna try this thing. I still don't know what's gonna happen. But at least I know like I get to choose this. I get to choose what happens next in my life.

Absolutely. Like I am a whole different person actually.

I know. I mean, just talking to you is amazing to see. I mean, you really are a different person and it's so wonderful to see, because the thing is is that even when you came and I'll say this, like to the people listening, like you were like such a star in our group, cuz you're hilarious. And so everybody loved when Lisa would like get coaching cuz it was just a riot. It was like a comedy show because you just have this personality that’s very funny and and very unique to you. And it was so sad to watch. And I see this with a lot of people where it's like all of that beauty, brilliance, right? Like all of that uniqueness that makes you Lisa, that makes you so unique from everybody else is buried under so much of, you know, the unhappiness. And it's like when you can lift that a little bit, like how lucky for the rest of us in this world for you to be able to show up in this way now where we get to experience that, you know what I mean? Like that's where the joy is, is like can we get everybody to show up in their like true unique, you know, cool, funny, weird, whatever it is humanness like rather than trying to conform into what everybody else wants us to be.

Yeah. Yeah. And I think, oh gosh, it, you know, I had to listen to your episode on regret because, um, you know, I spent so long just like oh my gosh, so many years of trying to conform and trying to be like everybody else, because I am, we all are our own unique, different beings. But having that like it it's it frightens sometimes, it frightens people that uniqueness and you know, being able to just express every feeling and every thought that have and um and being told to shut up and that, you know, like that stunted my writing as well. I mean, like as a by-product, like being able to speak out loud and be myself also informed my writing as well. As just like it started to flow and now I actually don't care what anybody thinks about it. Like it's mine. And I write for me, I don't write for everyone else.

I love that so much.

So, you know, I love it if you love it, but…

Which is like such an amazing place. Oh God, my wish for everybody is to get to that place, right. Where it's like can we stop with the people-pleasing and really just whatever, have whatever outlet it is for ourselves. And there will be people that love it. And there will also people that that don't and all of that's fine but tell everybody what happened is like at some point with that job and what you were saying, like give us kind of a rundown of what happened after you did the program.

So I was living in LA. My job was downtown LA and then the pandemic happened. So we all went home. It got really heavy in my neighborhood um in LA. And so I was like well, I, you know, why don't I just go stay with my family for a couple months. It was like summer and I can just work from home. And it was, I remember it being like really weird. It's like so normal now but, you know, it was like can you do that?

Right?

So uh yeah. I um I drove here to my sisters’ and then we just kept having events. Like there was like birth, you know, a 50th birthday, a wedding, a baby shower, you know? And so they were like just stay another month, just stay another month. And so then like, you know, the end of the year rolls around and I was like well, it's Christmas, you know? And so by then, we're just like no, maybe you're just gonna be here and I'm throwing rent away. So I went back to LA and I moved out of my apartment and I put it all in storage. And I remember I got back here and like a couple months later, my boss was like oh everybody, this is a year ago, everybody um, you need to pack up and probably just come on back. And I was like oh great, I just moved outta my apartment. And um, I was like, you know, I had a talk with my sister who, my gosh, I could never be more grateful. You know, also gratitude practice listeners do that, do it, do it. But, you know, we talked and she was like just just stay. I just, you know, we just want you to be happy. And it was very apparent that I was not happy. And so at this point I was about halfway into the Stuck To Strategy program. And I think that's the point where I was really, I felt like things were really shifting and I was starting to like, you know, you'll go up. And then you're like maybe you're skidding across the bottom. And then ta-da you hit the finish line. But it was after that, we just started talking and I kept prolonging, you know, like putting off everybody at work like oh, well, you know, this is happening or that's happening. And I need to stay another month and da, da, da. And it was also up in the air with them. And I really, as I began to trust myself and grow my confidence, I've never been a person who likes, sorry, uh authority. [Yeah.] Um I just, I can do it better. So my my rules are better. Um and I always wanted the freedom and I didn't like the control that they had over, like I was panicking every day. Do I, am I gonna move? Am I gonna, you know, and on top of all the stress that the job had. And so I looked at my finances, I talked with my sister. We, you know, I mean, I'm living in my nephew's room so I, you know, wanted to make sure that it was okay, you know, like with his work and everything. And it just all started to click and work out. And it's all those fears that you have like oh no, it's not gonna work. And oh, you're in this panic state but it's actually you just ask and then it works. And if you, if that doesn't, there's another option, there's always an option. I had some savings. I, you know, like I got things together. I was super stressed out at work, you know, I looked at it and then I was just like like suddenly everything seems possible. [Yeah.] You know if I go work at World Market or something, it's gotta be better. [Yeah.] I'm not gonna be crying every day. Like, you know, sitting here, like what's the benefit. [Yeah.]

Oh, working at home I can cry by myself. Like nobody sees me. So I just thought whatever it takes is whatever it takes. And I resigned.

I love that.

And so, yeah. And it was like a very happy holiday. [Yeah.] So, yeah. And I did that actually after the program, like I, you know, I went through the program and then there was like another couple months and some heavy thinking. And then I resigned in like November, I think it was. So…

I know, I remember that. I remember in the program, you’d decided I'm gonna resign, but you were gonna wha-, you were gonna wait like another year or you were gonna try to figure out how long you had to wait. [Oh yeah.] And that's a thing is part of the work that we do. And the reason I love that you're bringing this up is, again, a lot of times we have this idea of like I can't, I can't quit. I can't, you know, I, and and everyone's finances is gonna be different. Everyone's situation is gonna be different. And that's why we deal with this. You know, it's like each person has to figure out what's gonna work. But oftentimes when we change them, it's like of course you can. It's just like you're choosing not to. And that's fine. But when you start realizing what could I do if I wanted, right? And why am I not doing it? And I think a lot of times it is because of the thoughts of like well, I can't go from being an MBA working as, you know, in this bank as a manager and doing all this stuff to working at World Market. Right? [Yes.] But when you start realizing that you're like okay, but I'm miserable and I'm crying every day from the stress, right. Like why would I, you know, it's only my thoughts of like what people are gonna think of me and am I gonna be a failure and whatever. And when you start building your own confidence and your own trust, and it's not to say that you have to go work. I mean, Lisa didn't end up going to work at World Market. We'll talk about what she's doing. [I didn't but I love World Market.] Right. Who doesn't, right? I mean, I think about it oftentimes, and this is like a very sad way of, I don't wanna like bring down the thing, but this was like last year, like in the profession of Iaw, I was a lawyer and it has a very high like drug and alcohol abuse rate and also a very high suicide rate. And, you know, the bar is constantly trying to do things to help people with that. And there was a story that had come out and uh about an associate who had uh tragically taken his own life. And his wife was talking about how she was like begging him to like quit. And they were gonna, she was saying like they would move. And I I don't remember the job that she said se was saying like you could just work as like a substitute teacher or whatever, do something. Whereas, and I think about it and I think about like how every single person would be like oh my God, just quit. Like go… work at a Starbucks. Like for the, it's not worth what you're giving. You know, if it's this much stress, if it's this much panic, if it's causing this much turmoil like deal with your mental health and do whatever it is you need to make money. And yet aren't thoughts so much about our identity and what people think of us and what they're gonna judge. It's like [Yeah.] and we let ourselves get so far down this like rabbit hole of pain and misery and suffering and all this stuff because of these thoughts. That's why honestly, like I felt so passionate about doing this podcast when I started three years ago is because I saw so many people silently suffering to such a horrific extent that it's like none of this is worth it. And I remember when I left, it was the same thing. I kept thinking I would rather work at Starbucks. At the time there wasn't even Uber, you know? So it's like fine, now there's gig economy work and stuff but I was like I would rather do that than be this unhappy anymore, you know? [Yeah.] And it's just like you know, even seeing you kind of go through this because I, you know, recall how unhappy you were at this job and to see that power of like I can figure out a way to take care of myself. Maybe that means living with family, maybe that means taking odd-end jobs. Maybe that means doing whatever it is I need to do but like how do I do take control of my own life and decide like no more. I'm not doing this anymore. I remember when you had let me know when you resigned. And it was like just the weight lifted off, the happiness, where it's like I'm not going back to LA. I'm not going back into this office. I'm choosing a different path and I'm gonna choose like and we'll see what happens. Like who knows, you know? And I always tell people when they come, it's like I can't tell you if it's gonna work or not. I have no idea. Right. But I do know that you'll figure it out. I do have trust. Like I know that if you're somebody who has worked 13 years in these industry and gotten an MBA and like you will figure out how to make money for yourself. And it's a lie to think that you don't right. It's the lie that you've told yourself for so long that like I don't know how, of course you do. Let's figure it out.

Of course. Yeah. I mean, I've I got an MBA with concentration in entrepreneurial studies. [Right.] It's like [right.] hello, something's missing. Like what did I not pay attention to?

Right. Okay, so you resign and then so tell everybody what you have started doing, because this gets me so excited.

Okay. So the main thing was, you know, I wanted time to write, so I want to write. And because this helped me as a writer, I started helping other writers because I'm in kind of the position that I can help other writers who get started. [Yeah.] There's a lot of people who give up writing because they, you know, they don't know how to start or they don't know where their voice is or they feel like they're too busy. They're in a terrible job. They're taking up all their time but I'm telling you, you can find the time. And what I do is I help guide them just very gently into uh finding their own process, their own writing process organically and set up and build a regular writing practice that works with their schedule. Some of it involves a little, you know, classic conditioning but it's great. And it's working and I have clients that it's working for. [I love it.] And um I'm even working with a client who's a comedian. And so it's just fantastic. And I love it. And and it gives me time to write like I'm working right alongside with 'em. I have no words, which is extremely unusual. Um but I mean, it did, it really did. It's changed everything. It changed everything.

The reason I, and I want to really like back track for a minute is because for the listeners who, you know, may not be as familiar with your story and we've talked about, it's like you came into this program and you’re somebody that is an accomplished writer, right. Has written for screenplays, has been in film festivals, has won awards, has done all of this writing and you were believing this lie of like A, I can't make money as a writer and B, I can't really help people. And I was like I don't understand like this doesn't compute. What are you talking about? Why couldn't you? Right. And it was just because obviously, you know, we realized it's like all of just the lies, the doubt, the fear, and all this stuff, where we keep ourselves small, we tell ourselves we're not good enough. We're an imposter. I don't know what I'm doing. All of this stuff. Even though we have the accolades, right. Even though we have the like results, you know, when you're saying like I didn't wanna show this to my friends. I show it and they're all loving it. And then we submit it and it wins awards, all this stuff. You know, we discount it, that didn't count, that wasn't as, you know, it, I haven't done this thing. Like I have to, I don't know, somehow win like an Oscar before I can ever help somebody else. And it's like [Yeah.] biggest lie we tell ourselves. I always tell people I'm like what did I have before I started coaching people? My only claim to fame was that I quit a career. Right. Like it's like I, it was just like alright, I did it. And I worked on my own mindset so maybe I can help you. [Yeah.] And I remember we had a lot of those conversations. It was a lot of in the beginning like no, but I can't. And I was like but why?

Yeah.

And it was like once we decide we can, then we can start figuring out what does that look like? Maybe it's helping coaching. Maybe it's creating a community for writers cuz you you so clearly wanted to be in the writing world. Like you wanted to be writing. You wanted to be with other writers. [Yeah.] You wanted to like be like creating this community network like helping other people.

Like real support.

Yes.

Real support.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Cuz that's what was missing. And you were seeing for yourself like what was stopping you from writing and as you started doing this work and you started writing again, you were like I I know how now how to help people. And I remember being like what's the problem here? I don't get it. Like start helping people like get what better way than to use the thing you love to make money in order to be able to do the thing you love. Right. Like just like perfect situation. And so when you told me you were finally doing that, I was like oh, for the love of God, thank you. Yes.

Yeah, yeah. I had a lot of imposter syndrome too. Cause I was like oh, well who am I? You know, like it's not like I've had anything produced or I'm some big hotshot screenwriter of the moment but you know what, I'm somebody who's like lived through the darkest writer's block horrible horror stories. And so, you know, now I just enjoy helping other people with it. And one other thing, like you'll love this. Like I I'm like oh no, you know, I I I can't help anybody, you know, whatever. And I was going through some old pictures on my phone and I'd taken pictures of emails and stuff like this that I've gotten during film festivals. And, you know, I wrote that film and I sent it out there. It was my first one and people were rejecting it and you know, people were accepting it and everything like this but I tell you what, like there were people, big film festivals that rejected it but sent personal notes to tell me that they couldn't put it in cuz they didn't know where to put it. So then I had other film festivals that actually created a category for it. And the thing is is like if I had just like sat there and said oh it's too stupid. Let me just make up something else that sounds like everybody else, I wouldn't have gotten all this. Nobody was gonna send me an email. Oh, I just found it the other day. And I was like oh my God. They were like we're big fans. We hope you send something else. We just don't know where to put this in our festival. It doesn't fit into a category.

Yes. Well, that's so huge though because this is the thing. And one of the things that we work on in the program and I really like try to get us to change sort of where our attention goes. Right? Where is your attention spotlight? Like you just said the gratitude practice. Like if you look for positive, if you look for joy, you will find it. If you look for things to be grateful, you will find it. If you look for how horrible the world is and how much your life sucks, you'll also find that. And it's amazing to me when I see examples like this and when people, after they start doing mindset work and they start seeing it, it's like it was always there. Right? Like you got those emails before, you just discounted it. It was like oh whatever, it's a rejection so I'm not gonna even read the things they're saying. [Exactly.] You know, I didn't get in, I didn't get that goal. So nothing else matters. And then when you start seeing it, you're like it was always there. Right? All these people are telling me these things. Like I just think we make everything personal. And so it's like that person is saying like oh, you know, maybe the theme of our film festival doesn't fit this. So that's why we're not putting in. And we're like no, it's just that I'm a terrible writer. And they hate me and I'll never be successful. You know? It's like the person told you like this, it has nothing to do with that. You're like no, they're lying. They just hate everything about me. And so like we all do this. I talk to so many people who go on job interviews. And like I can give you stats of like how many resumes recruiters don't even look at. Right? It's like they look at 10% of their resumes or whatever. And it's like how many people already have the job because of connections. But they have to go through interviews. So like even in the interview, unfortunately, maybe like you were never gonna get the job. And I talk to people about this but they're like no, no, no, there's something wrong with me. I don't interview well, people hate me. I'm like oh, okay. We can think that story if we want. Sure. That seems very painful. Why would we go with that? Why not go with something that's less painful? So I love that you see that as an example now, it's like I hear this all the time where people will go back and they're like oh my God, I had all this evidence of how amazing I was and I just chose to ignore it.

I was like oh my God, I should email them back and say thank you. Like what a wonderful thing to say. Because I’m a completely different person than before. Just going oh sure, [Yeah.] they probably just copy paste that into everyone's email. No.

I love it. I love it. The brain is such a crazy place to live. Um.. [It is.] That's so amazing. So I'm so excited for you. So why don't you tell people like where they can find you and how they maybe can work with you if they're an aspiring writer and they need some accountability and some help getting through that writing block.

Yeah, so I am mostly on Instagram all the time. Um it's @TheWritersMindset um and you can also find it on Facebook, but you can just find me on Facebook as Lisa McFadden. Those are the two main places.

Awesome. Well, I will link those up in the show notes in case people can't write it down. Um and I would highly recommend if you are, you know, even wanting to explore writing, to check out Lisa. Cause I think she does incredible work. Lisa, I guess final thoughts for somebody that might be like where you were at that office job. Very unhappy. We're getting ready to open up doors uh soon and so anything that you would say to somebody that's kind of on the fence, they don't know if it's for them, they don't know if it's gonna work for them. Like any parting advice.

If you're on the fence about it, that's just your brain ticking away and telling you, you know, be skeptical. [Right.] It might be dangerous, you know, cuz it's outside your comfort zone. But I don't think that anybody could walk away and learn nothing unless they just signed up and didn’t go. So I think it's worth it and you should always be busting in yourself anyway so.

I agree with that.

Personal growth is is a great thing. It's our favorite thing.

Thank you so much for joining me, Lisa. It's been so fun chatting with you and I can't wait to see where all of this goes. So fun.

Yeah, I'm so excited. This was so fun.

How amazing is Lisa? I love that story and I cannot wait to watch her journey unfold. And if her story resonated with you, if you see yourself in that before, if you feel like you're living groundhogs’ day and every day you're getting up to the same job that you hate and you don't know what else to do. And you're starting to feel hopeless like Lisa was, I want you to join me in Pave Your Path. Do not prolong your suffering. You don't need anything else to be ready. You don't need anything else for it to be the right time, get in the group and start changing the way that you view your life. Start changing what you think is possible for you, start uncovering what it is you actually wanna do and learn to manage your mind around that so that you can actually build the confidence and go for it. This work, I don't say this lightly, will change every aspect of your life. It will change how you show up. It'll change your relationships. It will change clearly your career but so much more than that. So if you're ready to go, go to lessonsfromaquitter.com/paveyourpath. I hope to see you in the next round.

Thank you so much for listening. If you liked this episode, share it with someone else. I promise you know somebody who also hates their job and wants to quit, so why not share the love? And if you want to come follow along for more, come join me on Instagram at LessonsFromAQuitter and make sure you say hi. I'll see you next week for another episode.