- “I don’t know what to do.”
- I’ve heard this countless times in working with people stuck in careers they hate. I’ve been hearing it, even more, the past couple of weeks when it comes to anti-racism work.
- This thought is simply your fear. Fear of doing something wrong. Fear of upsetting other people. Fear of “wasting” your time. That’s it.
- You’ve convinced yourself that other people have it figured out and, if you could just find the “right” steps, then you, too, would take them. I want to let you in on a little secret. NO ONE HAS IT FIGURED OUT.
- Over the past two weeks, I’ve had a lot of people ask me what I plan on doing with my platform since I’ve started speaking out about the criminal justice system. I realize that their question assumes that I have a “plan”. That I’ve carefully thought of every step and I’m moving forward with some grand roadmap rather than I saw a need and jumped in to fill it. Just so we’re clear: I have zero plan.
- These past 2 weeks, I’ve been overrun with anxiety and fear. I have barely slept. And these are some of the thoughts that have been running on a loop in my head:
- – Who am I to talk about this?
- – What will people say?
- – What if I sound like an idiot?
- – What if I get it wrong?
- The only difference is that I’ve spent the past couple of years learning how to manage my mind. I know that those thoughts are just my fear trying to keep me safe (read: stuck). I feel that fear and I do what I want to do anyway. I take the first step without knowing if it is “right”. I learn. I pivot. and I keep going. That’s it. That’s the whole plan.